Coffee quotes and sayings

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat.
Alex Levine

Well, they’re Southern people, and if they know you are working at home they think nothing of walking right in for coffee. But they wouldn’t dream of interrupting you at golf.
Harper Lee

One more cup of coffee before I go to the valley below…
Bob Dylon

Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic’s best friend!
Gerard Way

Coffee makes us severe, and grave, and philosophical.
Jonathan Swift

Coffee: The first peripheral!
Anonymous

Coffee? No thanks, one more cup & *I’ll* jump to warp.
Captain Janeway

A flying saucer results when a nudist spills his coffee.
Anonymous

Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
Stephen Wright

I would rather suffer with coffee than be senseless.
Napoleon Bonaparte

Coffee, n. break fluid.
Anonymous

A leaf fluttered in through the window this morning, as if supported by the rays of the sun, a bird settled on the fire escape, joy in the task of coffee, joy accompanied me as I walked…
Anais Nin

Bring me A bowl of coffee before I turn into a goat.
Johann Sebastian Bach

Decaffeinated Coffee. It’s useless warm brown water.
Heard on David Letterman

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.
Stephen Wright

I’d stop drinking coffee, but I’m no quitter.
Anonymous

Our culture runs on coffee and gasoline, the first often tasting like the second.
Edward Abbey

I never laugh until I’ve had my coffee.
Clark Gable

A mathematician is a machine for turning coffee into theorems.
Paul Erdos

I don’t want anything better, I want coffee.
Captain Janeway

I don’t have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without caffeine!
Anonymous

Its amazing how the World begins to change through the eyes of a cup of coffee!!
Donna A. Favors

All the coffee in Columbia won’t make me a morning person.
Anonymous

Dinsdale, He was a nice boy…. He nailed my head to a coffee table.
Monty Python

Why don’t you have a cup of coffee at least? I, um, I’m a little low in sugar and I don’t have any cream, but it’s real coffee.
Barbara Streisand

I’ll quit coffee. It won’t be easy drinking my Bailey’s straight, but I’ll get used to it. It’ll still be the best part of waking up.
Will and Grace

My blood type is Folgers.
Anonymous

Espresso is to Italy, what champagne is to France.
Charles Maurice de Talleyrand

I think if I were a woman I’d wear coffee as a perfume.
John Van Druten

For I have known them all already, know them all — have known the evenings, mornings, afternoons, I have measured out my life with coffee spoons.
T.S. Eliot

Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break.
Earl Wilson

He was my cream, and I was his coffee – And when you poured us together, it was something.
Josephine Baker

Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.
Dave Barry

If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.”
Abraham Lincoln

Deja Brew: The feeling that you’ve had this coffee before.
Anonymous

The use of (coffee) will probably become greatly extended — as in other countries, it may diffuse itself among the mass of the people, and make a considerable ingredient in their daily sustenance.”
Benjamin Moseley

I hope some day to make you all a cup of coffee. Alright, peace.
Johnny Depp

I have measured out my life with coffee spoons.
T.S. Eliot

When traveling with someone, take large doses of patience and tolerance with your morning coffee.
Helen Hayes

Coffee is a fleeting moment and a fragrance.
Claudia Roden

Tis pity wine should be so deleterious, for tea and coffee leave us much more serious.
Lord Byron

A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
Paul Erdos

We usually don’t notice until the coffee tastes funny.
Anne Afdahl

Black coffee must be strong and very hot; if strong coffee does not agree with you, do not drink black coffee. And if you do not drink black coffee, do not drink any coffee at all.”
Andre Simon

Good communication is just as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.
Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Over second and third cups flow matters of high finance, high state, common gossip and low comedy. Coffee is a social binder, a warmer of tongues, a soberer of minds, a stimulant of wit, a foiler of sleep if you want it so. From roadside mugs to the classic demi-tasse, it is the perfect democrat.
Anonymous

This coffee falls into your stomach, and straightway there is a general commotion. Ideas begin to move like the battalions of the Grand Army of the battlefield, and the battle takes place. Things remembered arrive at full gallop, ensuing to the wind. The light cavalry of comparisons deliver a magnificent deploying charge, the artillery of logic hurry up with their train and ammunition, the shafts of with start up like sharpshooters. Similes arise, the paper is covered with ink; for the struggle commences and is concluded with torrents of black water, just as a battle with powder.
Honore de Balzac

See how special you are? I serve you coffee in the parlor.
Anthony Quinn

Ultimate office automation – networked coffee machines.
Anonymous

Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older, I begin each day with coffee and obituaries.
Bill Cosby

Do I like my coffee black? There are other colors?
Anonymous

Don’t laugh at the coffee. Some day you, too, may be old and weak.
Anonymous

Docs? Oh, you mean the stuff you wipe up coffee with?
Anonymous

I make serious coffee – so strong it wakes up the neighbors.
Anonymous

Coffee leads men to trifle away their time, scald their chops, and spend their money, all for a little base, black, thick, nasty, bitter, stinking nauseous puddle water.
The Women’s Petition Against Coffee

C:\COFFEE.POT missing A: Abort R: Retry F: Fall asleep?
Anonymous

Chocolate, men, coffee – some things are better rich.
Anonymous

I’ve just arrived in New York City. What a place! Just smell those skyscrapers. Had breakfast at a little deli on Ninth Avenue. Cheese Danish and a cup of coffee, black as a moonless night.
David Lynch

A fig for partridges and quails, ye dainties I know nothing of ye; But on the highest mount in Wales Would choose in peace to drink my coffee.
Jonathon Swift

Everybody should believe in something. I believe I’ll have another coffee.
Anonymous